So it turns out one of my favorite *time-pass* writers, Chetan Bhagat is launching his new book next week. I refer to his writing as *time pass* because as much as I enjoy every bit of filminess in his writing and his books make awesome one-day/one-time reads, they can never be anything more than that to me.As amazing as they are in what in they're probably intended to be, I can never consider reading a Chetan Bhagat book as *reading*. So, keeping debates about his writing aside, this book is titled "Revolution 2020" and rather than wondering about the content of the book, the title itself got me thinking about the year 2020. That's 9 years from now and considering HOW MUCH can be changed in 9 months, the magnitude of change that one will see after 9 years is hard to even imagine.
To me , the scariest change and probably the first one that comes to my mind when I think 9 years ahead, is going to be the general state of relationships !
With the downward trend that has been seen , I can safely say they will be the furthest thing from people's minds. Everything BUT that will have priority.With each passing day, I can feel people growing a bit more cold, a bit more selfish, a bit more guarded and A LOT more astray from living lives that just revolve day in and day out around just one person. Importance of things in life have reversed their order and today,I would place a job over a person, work over friends ,because that's just probably how it works. We end up taking most of the people for granted without realizing it and when we do, we convince ourselves that they would probably understand ,even though at times we know, were we at the receiving end of things, we wouldn't either! We live days where we barely spend 5 minutes a day just talking to the people we live with . When we do have those 5 minutes of solace, all we want to do is spend it with our selves. Today, every relationship starts and ends at ME- my choices, my priorities, my goals, my decisions, ME.They say life is too short and sometimes, this hits you , that in the end, you shouldn't be sorry for choosing to live an unfulfilled life for yourself while fulfilling ONLY what someone else expected out of you.
Is this attitude of being "me-centric" entirely wrong ? I don't think so ! Right now everyone is striving hard to find the right balance and find a spot somewhere that comfortably adjusts the chaotic work life and blends it with a quieter, calmer personal space.Most relationships don't break because of personal problems, they just fall apart because two people do not have enough time to work both in their professional life and then come to their personal life and work through problems there too.
This is one of the main reasons for the sorry state of marriages today and contradictory to the popular notion of the high divorce rates being an influence of the western culture, it's because of the fact that no one willingly wants to spend their free time sorting out issues that are both time and mind consuming.It's easier to walk away than to stay and fight , because no one has or is willing to waste that kind of energy anymore. It's sad, but it's true. It's a personal opinion that 10 years or may be even 9 years down the line, marriages will be as extinct as dinosaurs are today.I just DON'T see them working and being the over-hyped tradition that they are, people will be too scared to enter into a marriage and then walk out ,so will decide to live a single and happy life instead.I don't think it's just me, A LOT of people I know, don't believe in marriages anymore. I for one, find them to surreal. Relationships shouldn't be as forceful in nature as marriages are.The constant "in-your-face-24x7" challenge that marriage throws at you is hard to live with. Personal space is necessary, marriages do everything they can to take that away and force you to think it's wrong to have your moments of ," me" time when you can barely manage spending "we" time. A lot of what marriage puts you through is extremely sexist! At least in Indian marriages, it is ! And today , with the kind of attitude that people walk around with, I don't think an institution like marriage which has its century old rule-book is here to stay for long!
As much as this sounds like a western attitude talking, the reality is that people are just getting to know everything they can achieve just by themselves, the fact that in today's world women too can dream, too can have a successful career ,are no longer a "burden" and no longer need to marry just so that someone else can pay their bills , has broken many illusions that marriage had set.
Talking about conventional, I would LOVE to see a movie where in for ONCE a woman chooses a career over a man and doesn't regret it ! Meryl Streep's role is Devil wears Prada continues to remain my favorite in that regard!
With the downward trend that has been seen , I can safely say they will be the furthest thing from people's minds. Everything BUT that will have priority.With each passing day, I can feel people growing a bit more cold, a bit more selfish, a bit more guarded and A LOT more astray from living lives that just revolve day in and day out around just one person. Importance of things in life have reversed their order and today,I would place a job over a person, work over friends ,because that's just probably how it works. We end up taking most of the people for granted without realizing it and when we do, we convince ourselves that they would probably understand ,even though at times we know, were we at the receiving end of things, we wouldn't either! We live days where we barely spend 5 minutes a day just talking to the people we live with . When we do have those 5 minutes of solace, all we want to do is spend it with our selves. Today, every relationship starts and ends at ME- my choices, my priorities, my goals, my decisions, ME.They say life is too short and sometimes, this hits you , that in the end, you shouldn't be sorry for choosing to live an unfulfilled life for yourself while fulfilling ONLY what someone else expected out of you.
Is this attitude of being "me-centric" entirely wrong ? I don't think so ! Right now everyone is striving hard to find the right balance and find a spot somewhere that comfortably adjusts the chaotic work life and blends it with a quieter, calmer personal space.Most relationships don't break because of personal problems, they just fall apart because two people do not have enough time to work both in their professional life and then come to their personal life and work through problems there too.
This is one of the main reasons for the sorry state of marriages today and contradictory to the popular notion of the high divorce rates being an influence of the western culture, it's because of the fact that no one willingly wants to spend their free time sorting out issues that are both time and mind consuming.It's easier to walk away than to stay and fight , because no one has or is willing to waste that kind of energy anymore. It's sad, but it's true. It's a personal opinion that 10 years or may be even 9 years down the line, marriages will be as extinct as dinosaurs are today.I just DON'T see them working and being the over-hyped tradition that they are, people will be too scared to enter into a marriage and then walk out ,so will decide to live a single and happy life instead.I don't think it's just me, A LOT of people I know, don't believe in marriages anymore. I for one, find them to surreal. Relationships shouldn't be as forceful in nature as marriages are.The constant "in-your-face-24x7" challenge that marriage throws at you is hard to live with. Personal space is necessary, marriages do everything they can to take that away and force you to think it's wrong to have your moments of ," me" time when you can barely manage spending "we" time. A lot of what marriage puts you through is extremely sexist! At least in Indian marriages, it is ! And today , with the kind of attitude that people walk around with, I don't think an institution like marriage which has its century old rule-book is here to stay for long!
As much as this sounds like a western attitude talking, the reality is that people are just getting to know everything they can achieve just by themselves, the fact that in today's world women too can dream, too can have a successful career ,are no longer a "burden" and no longer need to marry just so that someone else can pay their bills , has broken many illusions that marriage had set.
 |
| Is it wrong to let your relationships take a backseat? Letting yourself achieve what YOU want as opposed to what you're supposed to want? I don't think it is ! No one has written and laid out rules of life and no one is entitled to do so either! It's okay to make your own rules and want to NOT want the conventional, the traditional and take the path that the "society" feels is the right one ! However, as this attitude is beginning to kick it, whether or not it will be one to stay and accepted as a way of life after 9 years would actually be the deciding factor in making the year 2020 a revolution. Relationships vs ambition is the ultimate battle and whether or not people will be okay with choosing something non-conventional for themselves is the deciding factor ! |
Talking about conventional, I would LOVE to see a movie where in for ONCE a woman chooses a career over a man and doesn't regret it ! Meryl Streep's role is Devil wears Prada continues to remain my favorite in that regard!
